A Year Ago…

Today marks the day a year ago when our little princess went home to be with our LORD and Saviour, Jesus Christ.

We had a quite day of remembering our little Rachel. We went down to the graveyard this morning and this afternoon to wipe down the fence around her grave and tidy things up a bit. You can imagine how dusty it all was – considering that we do live in the desert!

We thank the LORD for allowing us the privilege of knowing Rachel, and being able to look after and care for her. Her life on this earth was a short one, but definitely a life with a purpose. Sometimes it’s hard to think that or to understand that, but we need to remind ourselves that this is something only our Father in Heaven knows the answer to – and that needs to be answer enough for us left on earth.

Every good and perfect thing comes from our God, and God’s timing is perfect – even if we cannot see it. We were reminded of the passage from 1 Peter 5v7 “Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you”.
Life is a gift that belongs to our Father in Heaven. He knows what is best for us according to the plans He has for us.

We thank our family for standing by us through all this, as well as all our friends.
And a special thanks to all of you who have your own lives, and your own worries, and yet found it important enough to remember us at this time. We thank our Father every time we remember you.

“What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord…”
Philippians 3:8a

With Thanks,
Roy, Ang & Nathan

Psalm 139

We’ve been having some challenging preaching and studies at UCCD and Cell Life Group since our new administrative/teaching Pastor John Folmar started a series on Psalms two weeks ago.

On Friday he did a great job in brining Gods message in Psalm 139 to us, and last night Pastor Daniel Splett continued the challenge in being “Running to, or from God” at Cell Life Group

Although totally unrelated, in my personal devotions this Psalm has brought me renewed peace regarding Rachel, who at this time last year was admitted to Dubai Hospital for the last time …

Psalm 139

O LORD, You have searched Rachel and You know her.

You hemmed Rachel in – behind and before; you laid your hand upon her. Such knowledge is too wonderful for us, too lofty for Angela and I to attain.

For you created Rachel’s inmost being; You knit her together in Angela’s womb. We praise You because Rachel was fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, we know that full well. Rachel’s frame was not hidden from You when she was made in the secret place. When Rachel was woven together in the depths of the earth, Your eyes saw her unformed body. All 221 days ordained for Rachel were written in Your book before one of them came to be.

You searched Rachel, O God, and know her heart … lead Rachel in the way everlasting.

Yours in Him

Roy

Eulogy to Rachel

(As read at the UCCD Memorial service for Rachel this morning)

If there’s one thing we’ve learnt through all of this, it’s that God changes our plans into His plans very quickly.

We planned to have another baby. We were sure that the time was right and that Nathan would enjoy a friend as they grew. We started thinking of all kinds of things we would be able to do as a family – especially when the kids got older.

Things didn’t quite work out the way we planned. The pregnancy was filled with complications: the placenta was tearing away from the uterus, it was also low-lying. The amniotic fluid was not at the correct level, there was premature labour, bed rest for 7 weeks… and of course during this time we found out that the baby may be sick. NOT what we’d planned.

They had to take Rachel out a week early because the placenta was calcifying. After she was born she was taken straight to neonatal ICU. She was sick and we weren’t sure how serious things were – but they didn’t look good.

After about two weeks though we did eventually take her home with us. To us she was perfect! Only cried when she was hungry or needed a new diaper. Nathan loved her and just wanted to make sure she had her soother. She went back to the hospital a couple times and sometimes it looked so serious, we weren’t sure she’d make it. But she did!

We were even able to bring her home to Dubai! She had regular appointments with the doctors. She started to do so well and to us it seemed as if the doctors were becoming more or less satisfied with her condition.

It was just when we thought that the worst was over and she’d get better that we were told there was nothing more they could do for our baby. She would die.

It felt like the kind of thing that happens in the movies – or to other people. NOT to us! We were upset that something like this would happen to us – to our baby. And, what would we tell Nathan?!

But God carried us though it all. Obviously some days were harder than others, but we could see God’s presence. We saw (and still see) the way He helped us explain it all to Nathan in a way that he could understand. We saw the way God helped us spend endless hours at the hospital looking after our little girl, praying with and for her, watching her suffer – sometimes so terribly.

We saw God’s presence in Rachel. When we thought she was really suffering she was always ready with a smile for us.

The last 2 days were the hardest. She couldn’t smile, she cried all the time. Only wanted to be held and it seemed as though she had to will herself to take each breath.

Although we loved her very much all we could pray was that God would take her home! That He would end the suffering. We know she’s in Heaven and praising the Lord! How blessed is she!!!!

She suffered a lot on this earth and experienced pain like no person should – but she was spared the harsh realities of life that all of us are faced with in day to day life.

Our little lamb is safe in Heaven, praising God.
What more could we ask for?

Memorial Leaflet Handout
Memorial Slide Presentation – Images of Rachel (careful, big 16MB download)

Rachel’s Burial

This morning we buried Rachel’s body. We had a private graveside ceremony at the Dubai Christian Cemetery (near Al Wasl Hospital) with just close family and very close friends. It took three days to clear the paperwork to bury her body.

We spent the rest of day enjoying a loverly meal with some close friends and then simply sat on the beach and experienced God’s love, grace and care for us.

(P.S. The photo was added on the 12th Nov, after the memorial service when we had some flowers to cover the bare mount)

Memorial Service

We’re not too sure when “the paperwork” will be complete and we’ll have Rachel’s body for the burial, but we’ve been able to set the Memorial Service date for Friday 12th November.

The service will follow after the UCCD morning worship service at the DECC facilities (Jebel Ali), which means it’ll probably start at 11:30am.

We invite all who’s lives have been touched by Rachel’s life to attend the service.

Yours in Him

Roy, Angela, Nathan, Dad and Ma.

Rachel’s gone to be with Our Lord

This morning, at 11:17 Rachel peacefully went to be with Our Lord – We will all miss her, and her cute little smiles and giggles … Those penetrating stares where you felt she’s looking deep inside your heart …

We are happy though, as we know she has traded her pain for praise, and trust God is enjoying her more than we ever could.

Yours in Him

Roy, Angela, Nathan, Dad and Ma.

MCOD

Rachel Update

Rachel has been very peaceful the last two days. She’s been sleeping alot. She does however not like sleeping in her cot, and Angela (or whoever else is nearby) needs to hold her for her to be confortable (i.e. not cry)

They tapped her again today and she seems to be in very little pain or discomfort – The only thing she cries for/about other than being held is her bottle, which she hasn’t been getting due to the “tube-feeding” – She gets a sip of water every now and then which she really seems to enjoy.

We continue to pray that Our Lord will give her grace and keep her without pain.

Yours in Him

Roy, Angela, Nathan, Rachel, Dad and Ma

Pulmonary edema

The results of yesterdays tests have come through – Angela met with the doctors this morning and Rachel’s medical outlook is rather bleak. Rachel has Pulmonary edema, which basically means fluid accumulating and swelling in her lungs. Further, as her spleen and liver continue to expand, along with the ascites (i.e. fluid build-up in her abdomen) the area in her little body for her lungs and heart is about half what it should be, making things a bit more complicated as well.

Rachel is on medication for the pain and Angela said she’s been restful and sleeping all morning, which is something we’re very happy about.

Please pray for us all during what seems to be the last stages of Rachel journey here on earth as she starts towards a much long longer one … an eternal one, full of promise, praise, joy, and Our Father watching over her.

Yours in Him

Roy, Angela, Nathan, Rachel, Dad and Ma

Another Quick update

Just spoke with Ang’ again – As we were told earlier Angela has had a busy morning. They took a chest x-ray of Rachel, and also some of the phlegm to test in an attempt to identify the virus.

Rachel had some physio to loosen her chest as well and at the moment is sleeping, rather soundly.

We’re hoping to get the results of the chest x-ray and phlegm sample by this evening

Quick Update

Just spoke with Ang’ (who had a rather broken night of sleep)

She spoke with a doctor already and later today they’ll take a chest x-ray of Rachel as well as some tests on the extract (i.e. phlegm) – They may even do some physio to try loosen up her chest.

RS-Virus again …

Rachel didn’t have a good night … She is full of phlegm and due to this the doctors have decided to “tube-feed” her for various reasons – Primarily Rachel is very short of breath. Drinking her milk also seems to be increasing the chest congestion, and she’s also coughing a lot.

To Angela it seems as though Rachel has again picked up a Respiratory syncytial virus (RS-virus), as she had in South Africa during May. The RS-Virus is a common cause of acute bronchitis in small children, and Rachel certainly seems to be showing those symptoms.

Furthermore, Rachel isn’t too comfortable with her feeding tube and was constantly pulling it out, so the nurses had to tape her hand closed with some ad-hoc mittens.

We pray Rachel and Angela will have a peaceful night – Although Rachel was exhausted and sleeping when we got there this evening just after six, she later woke up (approx. 7:15pm) , and having just got off the phone of Ang’ now (10pm) I’ve learnt Rachel has been crying ever since …

God Bless

7th Month

Today Rachel is 7 Months old … It’s also the 31st Day that she’s been in Dubai Hospital. She seems to be doing ok, but had a bit of a fever when we arrived to visit with her this afternoon. Angela was with her and had already asked for some medication which seemed to have broken the fever.

Rachel seems to be getting weaker, but it looks like it’s just making her hold on so much more tightly – She’s still very alert, and fully aware of what’s going on around her – She follows conversations by turning her head to the speaker and when asked to “smile for the camera” most of the times she will … Too cute!

Please pray with us as we continue to love our little princess and wait on the Lord for his grace to us all …

All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be Psalm 139:16b (NIV)

Yours in Him
The Verrips Family

Sweet like Chocolate

Angela gave Rachel some Chocolate today – As you can clearly see … Rachel LOVES chocolate!.

Tooth be told!

Rachel is doing better – Her Sodium levels have returned to normal, which means that when we were visiting with her this afternoon she was a lot more alert, “Smiled for the camera” and seemed to constantly be looking at whoever was talking …

Also, and this is the really exciting bit – You’ll notice a new link (on the left menu of this website) to Rachel’s Toothchart - Why? ’cause today her first two teeth popped out after what must’ve been the longest teething period ever :-)

Both her bottom central incisors (That’s bottom middle to the rest of us) have erupted – Click on the link for a graphic presentation

Yours in Him

Roy, Angela, Nathan, Rachel, Dad and Ma

Rachel’s unstable

The doctors said this morning that Rachel is in an “unstable” condition – Looking at her observations (Click on the small image for a more detailed on) you can see she’s not doing too well.

Her temperature is stable (praise the Lord) showing that she doesn’t have an infection.

Her respiration however is very fast at times, and slow at other times – Her respiration seems linked to her girth though – The girth measurements show the effects of the ascites (i.e. fluid ’round her liver/spleen) and the draining there-of, and thus subsequently the speed at which she is breathing, (i.e. her respiration)

What is not included in the graph is her blood pressure, which follows pretty much the same pattern as her pulse-rate – Her BP peaks at around 102/51 and has once dropped to 67/35 but usually is in the region 80/40

At the risk of this turning into a medical journal, the long and short of it is that Rachel seems to be staying steading in her deterioration. What Doctor Badriya did however stress this morning as well was the fact that Rachel is loosing a lot of weigh, and the blood tests they did this morning also shows her sodium levels are very low.

Most of the body’s sodium is located in the blood and in the fluid in the space surrounding the cells. Sodium is required by all cells in the body to maintain a normal fluid balance. Sodium plays a key role in normal nerve and muscle function.

We’re worried because the brain is particularly sensitive to changes in the sodium level in the blood. Symptoms of something low sodium levels, i.e. Hyponatremia are lethargy and confusion, and we’ve definitely noticed that Rachel is a lot more restful these days (i.e. lethargic). As hyponatremia becomes more severe, muscle twitching and seizures may occur which we pray will not be the case.

The challenge is that due to the amount of fluid that is drained every other day, and the subsequent fluid intake via the her drip, Rachel’s little kidney’s are very confused with the sodium levels, but the doctors are giving her something for it, and we pray it will keep her comfortable.

We pray also that the Lord will continue to keep us all in His Grace.

Yours in Him

Roy, Ang, Nathan, Rachel, Dad and Ma

Pic of the Day

21 today …

It was on a Wednesday, three weeks ago that Rachel was last admitted into Hospital and she hasn’t been home since. This is the longest single stretch she’s been in hospital, a day longer than when she was in Pretoria East Hospital in May with the RS virus, and week longer than when she was born in early April.

I spent the afternoon with Rachel today, giving Angela a chance to spend some time with Ma as the two of them hardly ever see each other as they work opposing shifts at the hospital.

I enjoyed the time with my little darling – She is so cute and very eager to have a bit of fun – We played “Peek-a-boo” and “Where’s the baby” and she enjoyed that a lot. She’s developed the cutest facial expressions when she’s looking at something and concentrating on it and her eyes seem to “say” a lot more these days.

Rachel is however getting weaker and more subdued daily. During the five hours I spent with her yesterday she slept for about four of them – Her blood-pressure is gradually dropping, indicating a weakening heart, which is very understandable given the amount of strain it’s under due to the portal hypertension. She seems very drowsy at times – We praise and thank the Lord though as her comfort level seems to have increased, i.e. either the pain she was experiencing in the last couple days of last week has gone away, or she’s dealing with it a lot better with the help of the pain medication.

We continue to ask our Lord for strength and vitality during this time – The routine of the daily swap-over between Ma and Angela, and the hospital visits with Rachel, is not only an emotional drain on all of us (Nathan included) but is physically draining at times as well – As I locked up our home a few minutes ago Angela, Nathan and Dad were all fast asleep, clearly exhausted from everything that has been happening these last three weeks.

We entrust ourselves in the Hands and Will of our Lord and know He is keeping us in His grace

Yours in Him

Roy, Angela, Nathan, Rachel, Dad and Ma

Nathan’s Bat and Rachel’s Portal Hypertension

At the moment Nathan is learning all about Animals at Ms Kay’s place – Today he made this “bat” … Isn’t it cool!?!

Rachel seems to be a lot more comfortable now that she’s on pain medication – The doctors are a bot concerned for her though as she now seems to also have portal hypertension, which can be expected in a someone with final stages of liver failure.

You see, normally, blood is carried to the liver by a major blood vessel called the portal vein. If blood can’t flow easily through the liver because of cirrhosis, the blood gets slowed down in this vein and the pressure inside the vein increases. This higher blood pressure in the portal vein is called portal hypertension.

If blood can’t flow normally through the portal vein, it must return to the heart using other blood vessels. These vessels become swollen because of the increased amount of blood flowing through them. They are called varices. Varices have thin walls and can easily break open because they aren’t meant to handle such high-pressure blood flow. Bleeding from a broken blood vessel is serious and can even be fatal.

Yet, our God is an awesome God and we praise Him for the wonderful love he displays unto us.

Yours in Him

Roy, Angela, Nathan, Rachel, Dad and Ma.

As you can see, Rachel is smiling again – Last night she was on Oxygen through the night and this helped clear up her chest a lot. They’ve also started giving her some pain killers (Paracetamol) which has her a whole lot more comfortable too.

She’s sleeping soundly and is clearly not in nearly as much discomfort – When they drained her today though more than 300mls of fluid came out. The doctors are worried as it seems to be coming out very quickly when they “tap” her.

Angela and Ma are subsequenly doing a lot better as well now that Rachel is more comfortable.

Other news is that the month of Ramadan has started and most Muslims (i.e. more than 60% of the people in Dubai) have taken to fasting from prayers at sunrise (Sohour) to prayertime at Sunset (Iftar). Out of respect for those fasting most restaurants are closed during the day, and eating or drinking in public is considered to be disrespectful and could result in imprisonment (At least that’s the Urban Legend we’ve been lead to believe) – Please pray with us as we pray for those “lost” amoungst us.

Yours in Him

Roy, Angela, Nathan, Rachel, Dad and Ma

Update on Rachel

Rachel is not doing too well at the moment – I spent the afternoon with her while Angela, Nathan, Dad and Ma did some pre-Ramadan shopping.

Rachel seems to be terribly uncomfortable. When she’s not sleeping she’s either moaning, groaning or crying and it’s not easy for any us seeing her in so much pain. The doctors are a little apprehensive in administering pain medication fearing it will adversely effect Rachel given the strain her little body is in already under.

Please pray with us as we ask our Lord to be with Rachel during this time and give her peace, comfort and rest.

Yours in Him

Roy, Angela, Nathan, Rachel, Dad and Ma